#unfollowcharlie but not just that March 28, 2011

my friend started this site as a response to the #unfollowcharlie effort, but that was just a catalyst. she had been talking about doing something to help victims of domestic violence* and was formulating that plan before all of the hype flooded the media.

* you know, “victims of domestic violence”, while true, is no banner to wear. ‘survivor’ sounds better, more empowering I think, but I’d like a better description.

when she was talking about her plans and ideas, i offered support while not really knowing how i could help. the first thing that sprang to mind were a couple horrible events that occurred involving satellite members of my family (i say satellite to refer to third cousins, relatives by marriage, et cetera and so forth) and i’ll get to those stories in a moment. the second thing that occurred to me was how sad i felt about the state of the male psyche that could push a man to look at a woman as a possession and do such horrible things to her. and then i got angry and saw the red neon WOMEN ARE NOT PROPERTY flashing in my head. (more…)